“You know what? The amount of time I spend with you, any one would think we are in a relationship.”
“Hrmmphh! You would make a terrible girlfriend! I asked you to change my wipers last week! LAST week!!” grumbled her grumpy old gray car.
Pappu just rolled her eyes. She seemed to be doing that a lot these days.
Right now, more than her car, it was her GPS that that was getting on her nerves.
“After 500 meters, turn right” her GPS said with her virtual nose tipped above the mortals.
“Haven’t we already turned right twice?” Pappu replied, getting slightly irritated.
“Hrmph!” her GPS replied.
“You too??” Pappu rolled her eyes again.
Her thoughts went back to the time she switched on the GPS today.
“Where is Nirvana?” Pappu had asked the all-knowing GPS.
“Doesn’t everybody want to know?!” pat came the reply.
“I didn’t mean THAT Nirvana. Ninjeshwari is supposed to meet me at this place called Nirvana…”
“Oh that one! Her Nirvana is a long time in coming” replied the all-knowing GPS knowingly.
“What?”
“Nothing to bother your mane-y head with! I’ll take you there; just go straight for 700 meters, then take a left.”
“Ok”, and Pappu started driving promptly.
“In 200 meters, take a right.”
“But Ninjeshwari said to keep going straight…” complained Pappu.
“Is she your GPS or am I?!”, she replied snobbishly.
“Yeah, but Ninjeshwari is never wrong!” Pappu insisted. And her faith in that other worldly creature who seemed too fascinated with the word “SEXXXXXX” made her switch off the GPS and go straight.
Straight to a never ending road.
“Now what do I do?”, Pappu worried aloud. Grudgingly, she switched on the GPS back.
“Look who’s here!” remarked the GPS sarcastically.
“Ok, faaiine! You win! Now show me the way.”
“I’ll definitely show you!” she replied angrily.
“What?”
“Nothing!”
That was two “rights” before. Pappu was beginning to realize that maybe she was being taken for a ride… a long one at that.
“Look… I’m sorry ok. I know you know all the ways of the world…”
“In 200 meters, turn right” said the GPS, ignoring the apology.
“It’s just that Ninjeshwari is just so good at directions…”
“IN 100 METERS, TURN RIGHT!”
“But of course, she is not as good as you! I should’ve known that all along!” Pappu piped in, trying to fix the issue.
“…”
Taking her silence for acquiescence, Pappu went on, “…and it’s always you I turn to whenever I drive this old thing.”
“Hrmph!” the gray old car growled and threatened to break down.
“I meant it in a nice affectionate way, you dear old friend!”
“Hmmm”, he calmed down, satisfied for now.
“What I’m trying to say to you is that you are my true friend in need. Please don’t abandon me now.”
“Go on…”
Pappu gritted her teeth, preparing herself for what she knew was coming next.
“You are the…the… best thing that has ever happened to me.” Pappu said through her gritted teeth.
“You don’t sound too convincing…”
“I… rea..lly mean.. it,” she managed to get out.
“Grrr…”, the old gray antiquity was beginning to get jealous.
“Now you don’t start please!” Pappu pleaded. “Please GPS, just show me the way… I beg you!”
“Faine!”, she relented.
“Hey! That’s my line!”
“Turn right now,” the GPS sounded as if she would have shrugged if she had shoulders.
“Ok, as you say”, said Pappu as she drove on.
“Turn right again”.
After driving on, Pappu screamed in shock, “We are back where we started from!”
“Tee hee! Go straight for another 100 meters. Your destination is on the right” said the GPS, sounding happy with herself.
“But this is where Ninjeshwari had directed me to in the first place!” Pappu whispered in disbelief.
“What?”
“Nothing! I said, ‘You are amazing!’”
“Hmmm!”, the GPS replied back proudly.
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